I found it really interesting today that we were discussing in our communications class something I was actually thinking about quite a bit earlier this morning. It was about how when it comes do developing a relationship with people, that in a lot of cases some people need someone completely opposite of themselves in order to make a relationship work.
Basically I'm thinking about this in the sense of someone who's very much an introvert, kind of like myself actually. If you find someone else who's just as introverted as you, you're not going to be able to communicate or connect very well because you're both not quite as willing to open up to each other as you probably should be. Which I really think is a travesty, because I think that two introverted people can probably understand how each other feels more than anyone else can, because they're both very similar in a lot of ways that not a lot of other people in society really are. But if two people are going to be able to connect on any sort of level then you kind of have to be able to communicate with each other somehow. And if you get two introverts together that aren't so skilled at that sort of thing, it's just not going to happen.
I would know honestly, being as introverted as I am. The honest truth of things is that when it comes to communication, I will admit I do rely very heavily on the other person to carry on a conversation. That's just kind of how I am. But I have noticed in my experiences with trying to communicate with other introverted people, sometimes my conversations with them don't really go anywhere. I can sort of communicate with them, sometimes in some pretty fairly good conversations actually. But a lot of the time I find myself in a ton of those akward silence situations, probably moreso than not. Heck, I won't even deny that happens with people who do have the better conversational skills to carry on a conversation sometimes.
It is kind of sad though. Typically the kind of girl I've seemed to like the most in the past have been the more introverted ones, I think mostly because I feel like I can connect with them on a level I can't seem to otherwise because I can understand how they feel more. And I feel I have more in common with them because they're just like me. But at the same time I do wonder if that's the reason why I'm so pathetic when it comes to having the capability to get into a relationship with people, because that seems to be the only kind of girl I ever find myself to be interested in that way.
*Hug*
ReplyDeleteAwww, thanks Andrea. ^_^
ReplyDeleteI can totally see where you're coming from with this. I used to be terribly introverted and reclusive. I didn't talk to anybody and I didn't have many friends. I'm not really sure what it was that broke me out of my shell, but it happened in high school. I'm more outgoing now, but I still tend to, every once in a while, revert back to my old ways and I withdraw into my shell and won't talk or socialize with people. I think the best way I've found to get out of my shell is to basically kick myself out of it and force myself to be around other people. I think it helps to be around people who are outgoing, too. They'll tend to rub off on you and make you more likely to be less introverted.
ReplyDeleteJust my thoughts though.
I'm also a major introvert. I've had to force myself to come out of my shell, even around close friends. It's a lot easier for me to make friends if they start up the conversation.
ReplyDeleteOn the same line, I think that's why I tend to be attracted to the more outgoing guys; if they're willing to get the ball rolling, then I know that the ball will at least roll, as it were.
Yeah, I know exactly what you're talking about Teagan, I'm pretty much exactly the same way. I pretty much have to force myself out of my own shell when I talk to even the closest people I know. Either that or they themselves have to carry on or even start up a conversation with me. I have to say though I am much, much better at doing it these days than I used to way back when, but it's still a real problem I have. I have noticed though that when I do surround myself around more outgoing peoople, that's when I tend to have the most success with it.
ReplyDeleteIt's just that with those kinds of people I really only find myself connecting with them on certain levels unless we do eventually get around to much deeper levels of communication or if I've known them practically my whole life. In all honesty I do think that sometimes I connect with people deeper on a more nonverbal level than I do a verbal one. I think that's why I feel so drawn towards other introverts, because sometimes I really feel like I have a much deeper connection with them on that level, kind of like what I was saying in the post about being able to understand them as well as I do. I just wish that other introverts felt the same way about me.....